Recently I have been considering the true meaning behind the statement “Speaking your Truth”. Since I have been working on both healing and removing past karma to ascend, many new thoughts about life, circumstances, experiences and people have been coming to mind. I have seen people telling others they hurt them, and I have done this as well. I have seen people offering their opinions about behaviors, thoughts, etc, when they were never asked. I have seen people play victim, martyr, savior. And, we all have done this in one way or another in this lifetime and others. This to me is our ego, and not really our truth. As I understand it, the soul is our Truth. We need to connect to our own soul by healing the past.
While I have been one to question and deeply think about a lot of things in my life, I find now I’m doing it even more. I have been working on speaking my truth, as it is one of my biggest karmic lessons from many previous lifetimes. My mind has always been one to look at all angles simultaneously. I see the interconnectedness of many differing ways of being, different understandings of life and belief systems. I have been fascinated with other beliefs, cultures and ways of life for my entire life, and thus, am always open and accepting of other’s thoughts and opinions. This has sometimes stifled my voice, where I really wasn’t quite sure what my Truth was. I waited until “the right time”, and missed it. The right time is the moment, otherwise, it tends to pass on by. Other times it has opened my mind to something I hadn’t realized or considered.
So, now I’m doing all of this on a much deeper level, working on understanding where my ego is getting in the way. I have talked about letting our soul lead us, and to do this, we have a lot of ego situations and old karma to release, transform and heal. It is a very deep and layered process. Knowing we all are mirrors to each other, any and all interactions can be profound learning experiences. Being an energy worker for at least 10 years (Reiki Master, Intuitive, etc), while also working in the public at a busy restaurant for the past three years, I have had tons of learning experiences! When our feelings are hurt, it is our feelings. I believe, most people do not purposely hurt another’s feelings. So, is it okay to tell someone “you hurt my feelings”? Or “You made me angry”? I have read with relationships, we need to state “it hurt my feelings when…” or “it made me angry…”. This is a different energy. We are not blaming someone else, we are not playing victim, We are expressing our emotions. It is important to note, we are in charge of our own emotions. By saying that someone did something to you, such as “you hurt my feelings”, it is giving your power away. I once read someone say “wow, you are giving me a lot of power”, after another saying “you hurt my feelings”. Think about that. What is your Truth here? My truth is that I was giving my power away. My truth is still part of my emotional response, yet emotional response can be linked to ego. My ego was hurt. Ego is here to allow us to have a personality and carry out the wishes of the soul. When we give our power away, we are not listening to our soul. We are not taking responsibility for ourselves, our emotions, our thoughts, our opinions, etc. Our soul is a completely different energy once we start connecting to it. Learning about past lives via Akashic Records, or other means, can allow us to recognize why we are experiencing the lives we chose. Yes, the lives we chose. It may seem that someone would not want to choose a certain life, but the soul has a reason to learn that lesson, and to release past karma. Soul contracts, soul connections and soul lives are all part of our being and why we are here.
In this 3 year time frame, especially at the restaurant (and some family karmic lessons), I have grown quite a bit. Going through different layers of speaking my truth. From a gal who tends to be a huge challenge at work as she is rather pushy, to dealing with difficult customers, a large variety of personalities – both customers and co-workers – and being an energy worker, it has brought up so much to consider before speaking my truth.
I know speaking my truth is not being mean, aggressive or rude. Sometimes, it may feel that way to the other person, but that is something in them they need to address. But, I do my best to speak with kindness, love and compassion when I need to say something to someone. I do my best to be a bit diplomatic while allowing my emotions to show. For most of my life, I didn’t allow my truth to be spoken. A lot of it has to do with karmic lessons, and those are truths in themselves. The truth of who we used to be in thousands of lifetimes, and what we did, accepting them, learning from them, releasing them and letting them go. Many lifetimes I was not allowed to speak my truth for fear of incredible punishment, or abandonment or being literally kicked out of my home. Many lifetimes we have experienced as women were times when women were not seen at the same level as a man. Women had no power. When we exercised any type of power, punishment ensued. You know in your heart, male or female, you have experienced this or know it is still happening in certain parts of our world. The truth is that women and men are equal in that the characteristics of each need balance within us and this world. We need to find that balance within our own male and female characteristics. This is part of our truth. At least how I understand it right now. In other lifetimes, we may have been a male or female slave, who wasn’t allowed to speak. We may have been a prisoner of some sort. You may have been the jailer. You may have owned slaves. You may have participated in a variety of things, both “good” and “bad”, according to our soul’s and societies understanding of life. All of these lifetimes build up in us, creating karma and energy that we are here to release. That is one of my current truths: old karma energy needs to be released.
Speaking my truth is letting others know I am a soul working on healing and ascending. Through this process, I may have to voice something uncomfortable to myself or another. But, when we question why we are stating or voicing something, and understanding the deeper meaning behind it, we are learning, growing and becoming more soul focused. Soul comes from Spirit. Spirit is Love. Love of self and ALL. It is knowing each person is here for a reason. That reason may be complicated, or it may be simple. It depends on our understanding, our healing and our level of ascension. It is knowing that anyone’s understanding, healing or ascension level is neither right or wrong, neither good or bad, neither better or worse. It is that person’s current Truth. Truth is sometimes our opinion, our thoughts and beliefs. But we need to question those as to whether we truly believe them, and whether they are ego-based. Ego will judge itself and others, complain, argue the point, criticize and compare itself to others. Soul will allow others to be, and not be affected by other’s behaviors. Soul can show compassion, empathy, kindness and sympathy, yet soul understands there is a bigger picture on why, even if our current understanding does not know why. Again, this is my current understanding. As I continue my healing journey, releasing karma and ascending, I look forward to other, further and deeper understandings of Speaking My Truth, and what it means to be Living My Truth, and being even more Soul led.